Let’s turn once again to the great state get-together of the Minnesota State Fair 2013:
Up for breakfast, the Breakfast Sausage Corndog’s a sausage link coated in pancake batter that’s deep fried and served on a stick with a side of maple syrup.
I’d most be excited for Portabella Mushroom Bites, but unfortunately $9 only got fairgoers “small, sad, rubbery mushroom parts riding atop crostini.”
At the restaurant, Mancini’s Garlic Toast is a warm white and rye toast with slices that are “light and yet so thick that while the grill chars the outside to a crisp, the inside stays soft,” delicious enough to eat “slab after slab” of the buttery, garlicky delight. But at the fair? It’s more like “a plate of oversized and rather sad croutons, cold and crunchy and overpriced as a pick axe during a gold rush.”
Cafe Caribe’s Slider Trio “lived up to every negative stereotype of Mexican food in our grate state,” with “white sauce; thick, dry flour tortillas; and blandness kicked down to negative 11.”
Similarly bland was the Chipotle Chicken Salad Fajita. “If you could turn the abstract concept of ‘contempt’ into a food, it would taste like this,” writes a fairgoer. “[A] skeet shoot would have been an appropriate and emotionally gratifying end to this culinary monster.”
A little better? The Northwoods BBQ Taco, featuring pulled pork seasoned with bourbon maple syrup and garnished with coleslaw.
The Three Little Pigs Torta features pork loin (piggie number one), black forest ham (porcine pal number two), and applewood-smoked bacon (porker number three) brought together with lettuce, tomatoes, onions, Swiss cheese, jalapeño peppers, beans, avocado, and chipotle mayo on a toasted french bread roll.
There’s nothing to the Idaho Taco aside from topping a tater like a taco.
Same could be said of Philly Fries, with spuds subbing for the cheesesteak.
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